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The other day I was picking seeds out of a tomato, which is what I do in my free time, and I was like, Man! There are more than 200 seeds in here! This farming stuff is for chumps. If I planted these 200 seeds, I would get 200 tomatoes. And if I planted the seeds from those tomatoes, I would have 4,000 tomatoes. Do that 4 more times and Id have 320 billion tomatoes. Sell each of those tomatoes for 10 dollars at the farmers market and boom: Im a trillionaire. But then I learned that there was one little hiccup with my plan: farmers dont replant their own seeds anymorethey just throw them out. Why? Well, according to the Official Manual For Defending Billion-Dollar Agriculture Companies, saving seeds leads to all sorts of crazy problems like reduced crop yield, susceptibility to disease, and, you getting dumped by your girlfriend for reusing seeds every year like a dirty loser farmer instead of buying Monsantos new tricked-out seeds with all the latest features. But, uh Im
