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Here's an idea. Every argument for pronouncing G-I-F is wrong. And that's OK. Recently, I was talking to someone. And I said oriented, as in let's get oriented. My interlocutor responding said orientated, which before you get all judgy and if we're to treat the dictionary as an authority of some kind, orientated is an acceptable alternative to oriented. Our conversation lasted five minutes. Me saying oriented. He saying orientated. Neither of us acknowledging the difference. Both knowing exactly what the other meant. Just how like my girlfriend is English and says "to-mah-to," but I say "to-mat-to." And after many years, we continually decide to not call the whole thing off. (SINGING) Oh, let's call the whole thing off. Zero flame, calm civility. This is the dream that I have for zhaif-- gif-- jif. Today we're going to talk about the G-I-F pronunciation debate. And how every argument for pronouncing it the way that you like, super flawed. But that's OK. First though, some oft requeste...
