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emotionally focused therapy looks within how couples construct their emotional experience of relatedness and we use Rogerian interventions there we create all kinds of safety for people so we can guide them in exploring their inner world we can help them move from numbed out Ness or reactive anger into really listening to their emotions particularly their deeper emotions which we know in couples are mostly all about the fear of rejection and abandonment and also all about this longing for connection so we look within at how people create their emotional experience how they always step past their vulnerability into rage or how the minute their partner uses a certain tone of voice they numb out and if you say to them what are you feeling they say I dont know and we also look between and how couples engage each other using kind of systemic focus you could say that EFT is a conversation a conversation between carl rogers salvador minuchin with John Bowlby the father of attachment theory c