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If your child is over the age of 18, there is little that you can do about the decision to go live with their birth parents. You can definitely communicate with your child about why they have made this decision and support them in any way that you can, depending on the circumstances.
Most adoption professionals refer to biological parents as birth parents, but not everyone agrees that its the best term to use. The term birth mother comes from the Positive Adoption Language (PAL) framework developed in 1979.
Most adopted people are curious about their birth parents. The Search Institute found that 72 percent of adopted adolescents want to know why they were adopted, 65 percent want to meet their birth parents, and 94 percent wanted to know which birth parent they most resemble in appearance.
It is also common that the terms parent, mother, father, mommy, daddy, child, son, daughter, and all common names used when referring to the members of the adoptive family.Why Positive Adoption Language Matters. Terms to avoid:Positive Adoption Language:Adoptive parent/father/motherParent, mother, father, mommy, daddy11 more rows
Common Names for Biological Parents In positive adoption language, the preferred terminology is Birth Parents, Birth Mother or Birth Father. The word birth-parent is so inculcated within the adoption field, and thus my vernacular, says Tucker.
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Therefore, the only way a birth parent could reclaim custody of an adopted child is by proving to a court that the decision to sign the relinquishment document was done under fraud or duress. In most cases a court will automatically deny custody to a birth parent when their parental rights have been terminated.
Many Adopted children and adults have lingering feelings of being unconnected to their roots. Ive heard this feeling described as a void or emptiness that is felt deep in the core of a sense of not belonging. Searching for birth family members may assist in filling the hole and allowing connections to be made.
Adoptive parents tend to feel guilt toward their childrens biological parents as the more they bond with the child and grow to love them, the more they grow to fear the loss of that connection. In turn, the adoptive parents feel sympathy for the biological parents and feel guilty for taking away their child.
The adoptee must be at least 18 years of age (in some states, age 21) before he or she can gain access to this information, however an Adoptive Parent or guardian of an adoptee who is still a minor may be allowed access.
Many states across the country allow adopted adults and birth relatives to enter their names in a reunion registry, where the two parties may be matched and put in contact with one another. Some states provide a confidential intermediary service to help facilitate adoption reunions.

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