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so many of us who grew up with trauma live as divided selves longing for real love but playing along to keep people around who donamp;#39;t want that they donamp;#39;t want it with us anyway but theyamp;#39;re happy to soak up all our attention and time and of course sex our ability to believe that we can change how they feel by pouring out all this love and attention but never honestly finding out how they feel like not really hiding from that itamp;#39;s a classic adult manifestation of emotional neglect in childhood and as long as those old wounds are driving you youamp;#39;re going to end up with the same kind of unreliable love that was what you had to settle for as a kid so what do you do to flip the script here my letter today is from a woman Iamp;#39;ll call Vanessa and she writes dear Anna I grew up raised by a young single mother and loving grandparents my father was in my life for the first few years but my only memories of him are him being drunk and angry and having