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we talk a lot on this channel about limerence and thats the state of obsession and infatuation for someone who feels like they are the answer to everything in your life but theyre not actually in your life they could be a celebrity or imaginary or fictional or you know them they might even be an ex but they cannot or will not be with you its not possible so theres just this Perpetual longing that becomes like an addiction its easy to waste years retreating into the fantasy of being with your limerent object when being with them isnt possible so theres a way out and its time we talk about what happens after limerence so my letter today is from a woman Ill call Jesse and she writes hi Anna thank you for your videos Im writing to you because Ive been experiencing a lot of Shame as I come out of my fog and realize the way I used to treat people I was scapegoated as a kid from a lot of different sources and Ive been experiencing a lot of social trauma and abandonment wounds whic