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self-validation is a dbt skill that focuses on accepting the emotions that you are experiencing for people who experience overwhelming emotions it can be common to have a hard time accepting them as well for example you feel angry or depressed and you start telling yourself i am not supposed to feel like this i should know better so on top of the uncomfortable primary emotion you are piling on secondary negative emotions as well in order to help you cope with this exhausting process we look at three steps of self-validation that psychotherapist sherry van dyke calls acknowledging allowing and understanding self validation level one step one acknowledging first simply put a name on the emotion that you are feeling acknowledge it and try not to judge it or yourself for feeling it for example maybe you feel anxious instead of getting lost in the self-deprecating train of thought just acknowledge it by saying to yourself i feel anxious this is the first and basic step on which we are going