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[Music] next skill that were going to talk about is validation which i think is one of the most important and one of the more difficult skills when we talk about families and relationships so in DBT we talk about dialectics and what dialectics tell us is that multiple perspectives can be true or things that seem like opposites can exist simultaneously and so with validation validation is a way to handle and accept those different perspectives even if we dont agree with what is going on or dont agree with what that perspective is so why do we validate why is validation important in families well the way that we experience something might be different from the way that another person experiences something and it is so important to recognize that that someone else might be experiencing something differently than the way that you perceive it to be true or the way that you perceive it in general and so in validation we are recognizing the other persons experience as true and like it say