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for me what I wanted one of the things that I wanted to jump in and talk about thats something thats kicked around all the time in custody cases is the issue of narcissism the issue of you know a narcissistic and/or controlling person you know basically basically pulling all the strings necessary in in your case to put you or your spouse or whoever that is working through this case to put that party in a position where basically they feel like they cant get anything done like the person has a narcissistic tendencies is controlling everything in the case everything in a courtroom everything outside of the courtroom and the the court judged the attorneys the staff everybody seemed to be buying what theyre selling and the question always becomes how do I get around that how how was it possible for me to get around that and theres a plane going over where I am I dont know if you guys can hear that or not but narcissistic behavior there is not you know everybody at one moment or anoth